Mama update

This mama has been through a lot lately.

When I bore my testimony back in December little did I know what was coming my way: a beautiful baby girl, lots of new things to do and learn as a foster mother (and new mother to her), loss of employment the very day after I got her which left me puzzled and hurt beyond words (considering that I had been a top performer for the company for years, for nine plus years that I worked for them-first job out of college, but you can't do much about corporate downsizing especially when you are the only remote employee from you group), job hunting which I started shortly after I caught my breath and sorted through the myriad of feelings that poured over me.

I learned so much about myself through these trials though.... Although I would never truly ask for trials to learn from, I am grateful that He sent them my way. I would have never known what I'm truly made up of, how much I can be stretched, tried, punched, and how quickly I can get up, pick up, and dust off, stand tall, stand TALLER, smile BIGGER, and bear a STRONGER testimony of His infinite love for me, His daughter. I hit rock bottom the night before a final round of very thorough interviews with this great company when I felt that I was not going to be able to do yet another presentation. I felt inadequate, weak, tired, and sad. I had resolved that I would pass on this last round. Yes, it was what seemed a perfect opportunity, they liked me a lot, I liked the company but I also had a lot of conflict within. But luckily Hrishi, Ella, mom and dad were all there to pick me up, comfort me, and restore my peace and confidence. Late in the night when I was probably out of tears, I decided to go, to do what was required of me: to take this opportunity til the very end. And I am so glad that I did. I survived a full day of interviews with seven different individuals, from the very top senior Vice President of Products, directors, managers, well the way down to my to-be peers. The interviewing process was a tremendous experience in and of itself. I always believed in myself and knew my trade but when since I worked in the same company for over nine years and never had to prove myself beyond internal opportunities, or get out of my comfort zone for too long, but this built me up like no other professional or personal experience have before. The day after the interview, I received a verbal offer (this was on Thursday.) What a joy and relief. I started negotiations on Friday and I am looking forward to finalizing the details tomorrow. It still feels like a very real dream. Real because I'm in it, going through this mind and soul, and dream because I never hoped for such a wonderful outcome.

All I can say is that He loves me so so very much. Even when I fall short, even when I forget to put everything into His hands, He is always there. The spiritual promptings, blessings, the physical support I have received in these past couple of weeks have enriched me immensely. I shall never forget them.

I bore my testimony again last Sunday not knowing what was going to unfold in the week ahead. I had almost a perfect hope and a clear knowledge that everything was going to be fine and it was. It is. It is in fact wonderfully fine. There is no more to say. My heart is full: I feel like a brand new person. In so many ways I am a new person. :)
(And to close on a little lighter note: proud to say that I didn't turn to food through all this madness, I was in fact able to maintain and lose some more of the stubborn fat.)

And because I haven't written in a while, a few more things. Ella made the honor roll again this past term, is happily back in school, grown so big, so responsible, so caring and loving to Gracie. Gracie has put on quite a few pounds and is now a chubby stocky little girl whom we love so dearly. Hrishi is doing an awesome job in his new hot shot position. And I am thinking to do the two-day Avon Cure for Breast Cancer walk in April. 30 something miles. This seems like a pretty worthy goal on the fitness front to kick off the year. Last year in March I ran my first half marathon.